17 Nov I Realised…
Life can be divided into two periods. Before you know why you are alive and after. In between there is just a single moment – the Aha! moment. One brainwave that turns a person into a person on a mission. Choosing a single Aha! moment is nearly impossible. I’ve been blessed with a life filled with wonderful experiences—and epiphanies. Whether as a mother or Hypnotherapist or a Mindfulnes Teacher, I find every day seems to bring new and unexpected insights and understanding. For that I’m grateful.
Helping clients have more of those aha moments is actually my goal as a Hypnotherapist. Not to give them advice. Not to explain how things work or tell them how to fix their problems. While that’s probably what some people imagine it’s like to work with a hypnotherapist, the truth is we are more like guides. We simply illuminate the path on their journey, allowing them to see things about themselves more clearly—who they really are, how they can reach their potential, how they might be inadvertently undermining their own success, and how to maximize their strengths.
Early in my training, I met a mother and her daughter, 7 years old. The woman was obviosly depressed.
3 years later, the same woman contacted me and booked a consultation with me. She came together with her daughter, but this time the client was… the young girl. We had a conversation about the time we met before and I did remind her about that little girl who meticulously copied her mother`s every move, reaching for tissues, blowing her nose, dabbing her eyes—a tiny mirror image of her mother’s pain. Prior to then, I’d always thought of identification—the unconscious process through which we become like those we love in order to feel close to them—as little more than an abstract theory. But here was a young girl becoming like her depressed mother just a few feet away from me.
Few sessions later the woman rang me and said ” The magic happen, my daughter had an A-ha moment yesterday. She realized that this wasn’t about her; it was my issue.The idea that she could actually change her thoughts was an “aha” moment for the girl. Prior to that moment, she believed that “your thoughts were your thoughts,” and there wasn’t much you could do about it. “Our conversation has change my thinking as well – said the mother. I could choose continue to go over my “list of grievances” which did nothing but make me more and more unhappy. Or, I could choose not to feed those grievances and, instead, turn my attention to the lovely time people were having right at this moment and to the love I feel for my family. It was an epiphany for me. I’d never realized that we have the ability to choose where to place our attention and, by doing so, relieve our suffering and bring more joy into our lives. After that, I finally understood: for better or worse, we often absorb the traits and emotional lives of the people around us in process of forming an identity.”
I once led a fast paced lifestyle running through life without really living it. I was too busy with school runs, work, and developing my business to appreciate all the small gifts of life.
When I had a serious illness 2 months ago, a dramatic shift occurred in me mentally, emotionally and physically. I was no longer able to speed through my days and instead was forced to sit alone with my thoughts. The meditation jhas help me get through the loneliness. As a result, it changed my perspective on life.
I learned that rushing through my days was not a fulfilling way to live. Instead, I needed to be more aware of the life that was around me and appreciate all things large and small. By being present, I now notice small moments in life and gain much strength from the beauty within nature.
In my times of silence, I learned that I am not invincible and my life can be taken at any moment. This has reminded me to be grateful for every breath, every sunrise, and every sunset. I have become a firm believer in showing gratitude for all things because life is fragile.
By changing my perspective on life, I have become a more positive person. I am centered and happy because each decision I make now comes from a place of love. It saddens me that I rushed through my life and didn’t truly appreciate all the gifts life gave me.
I’ve heard so many people worrying about the weather on their wedding day, table decorations or plans and of course you want things to be perfect. But all that really matters is that you are happy and healthy and surrounded by all of the people that mean so much to you.
I never felt upset or angry with my situation, just motivated to keep fighting, get better and appreciate every single day I have. Not a day will go by when I am not grateful for this experience.
“Aha!”, “Eureka!”, “What-da-ya-know”… or just plain “hmmm.” Whatever we call it, it’s that single, magical moment when things just make sense; when that block that seemed to confuse and confound us suddenly seems small and insignificant. There’s that sudden rush of excitement, filled with relief and enthusiasm. Then comes the inevitable…
“Um, Now what?”